I am trying to relax. Be a more relaxed person. I am going to blame it on the whole birth order thing. As first born, I fit as the often uptight, law-abiding, control freak-perfectionist. I try to simmer down all of these tendencies, but I have never fooled those closest to me, and it is starting to show physically now… my shoulders are up to my ears and it seems as though I am constantly clenching every muscle in my body…like I am anticipating something dreadful around every corner.
Thanks to my o-so-carefree husband, I am beginning to practice a life that feels foreign. How to do well in something without letting it consume my whole being. I am choosing to not find my own justice when I have been wronged, to not get worked up about things that haven’t even happened yet, and to be okay with not having a plan- letting things happen as they come and being okay with what that means for everything else.
Caleb is taking me away this next weekend for my birthday. It’s a surprise. I don’t know if we are camping, going to a hotel, going to the beach or the wild woods. Not knowing would tend to get my panties in a twist because I want to plan. Make sure I have what I need. Practicing on being pleasantly surprised, trusting my man to know what I need. So here is to another week of Woosah with in everything. More of a trust in a hope greater than any daily anxiety. A love that covers all things. And because of that hope and love, a freedom from all fear.